Lesson 1: Mastering Your Life

6 - Choices: Selecting Goals

The first thing to determine is precisely what you want. Ask yourself, “Where am I headed?” “What is my goal?” That you know exactly what you want is vital. You must have a fixed idea before you can obtain what you desire.

People who have unclear goals and unclear pictures of themselves make unclear choices.

For some, growth is not a linear process, but it occurs in a cycle. The growth cycle involves setting a goal, conceiving a plan of action to meet the goal, and mobilizing personal resources to achieve the goal. Often failure to reach a goal will begin a new cycle. Therefore, failure is not necessarily a bad thing.  Presenting new challenges to a person will encourage growth although ultimately he or she must accept the opportunities for self-growth.

Growth means setting goals (both long-term and immediate), reviewing goals, modifying goals, and sometimes even abandoning goals for the prospects of better ones. Periodically review the goals you consider worthwhile for your own growth. Sort through your goals like you sort through your closet from time to time. Any goal that is outdated does not deserve your continued support.

Our number one need is to be liked by others. We must change our focus to finding approval within ourselves by attaining personal excellence, which means being buoyed up by even minor improvements in a variety of tasks. That will give us a sense of achievement. Start with small goals and eventually mastery will increase on many bases. Some people plan to start something new (a new activity for them) at least once a week. Life is full of fresh, new starts.

You probably have not considered the great multitude of choices that are presented to you every day. To get you thinking about it, consider some possibilities of choices of attitude or choices of action. Your feelings at any given moment are always determined or influenced by how you choose to feel at any given moment.

You likely have thousands of choices including:

• Who you spend most of your time with
• The books you read
• Your hobbies
• How much you exercise
• Whether you gossip
• Whether you are a leader o a follower
• How organized you are
• How calm you are
• How often you feel sorry for yourself
• How much patience you have
  
• How often you criticize

All of those are choices. How we handle each of those kinds of choices plays a very important role in how well we get through each day. Many of those choices clearly influence how other people treat us.

Ask yourself three questions:

• “How do I feel about the situation I am facing?”
• “How would I like to feel about this?”
• “How do I choose to feel about it?” Situations are neutral, your attitude is not.

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