Lesson 1: Roles and Group Influences
16 - Being Outside the Group – Dealing with Bullies, Unemployment
Dealing With Bullies
Bullies are aggressive people who derive satisfaction from overpowering and controlling others either physically or psychologically. They do not pick fair fights; their victims are weaker than they are. They are impulsive and dominant. Bullies are usually boys, but girls bully as well. Usually bullies come from homes where parents do not give them enough attention. The defenceless victims remind the bullies of their own vulnerability in an abusive home, which makes them strike out at their weaker victims with vengeance. Bullies tend to over-react to aggression in their peers. Often they attack peers without provocation. The typical victim is often quiet, sensitive, and anxious. Victims may give the impression that they are insecure and are not worthy; bullies target children they believe will not retaliate.
If you are singled out by a bully, do not suffer in silence. If you do, you could become a permanent victim of this individual. Find a network of friends or colleagues to give you support because bullies usually attack lone victims. If you are a school student, talk to a teacher or a counsellor about it.
Although bullying is a very negative behaviour, the power of group intervention can certainly be helpful in eliminating it or keeping it under control.
Unemployment
When people leave school as young adults, receive job training, and secure employment, their identities become closely intertwined with the kind of work they do. When people introduce themselves to strangers, they give their names and then their occupations. Our jobs give us many essential things:
• monetary rewards that we use for survival
• a group of colleagues who become part of our work team
• a sense of dignity, purpose, and self-worth because we are able to do something meaningful to justify our existence
Being unemployed destroys the network of support people need to satisfy all of those important needs. Being outside the employment group makes people feel helpless and isolated.
If you lose your job, a group of friends, associates, and former business contacts can help by providing some valuable leads in the job market.
Nowadays, more unemployed people are becoming self-employed by setting up their own companies or by becoming consultants to three or four different companies. These people have taken new approaches to employment by working independently out of their homes. How will the new network of independent workers have an impact on the sense of community? Will overall community ties be stronger or weaker? How will it affect other areas of community spirit?