Assignment 19 (Week 27 - Apr 03) - Sexual Assault
Completion requirements
Opened: Wednesday, 29 January 2020, 5:38 AM
Sexual Assault Questions and Answers
What is sexual assault?
- Sexual assault is any ofrm of sexual activity forced on someone else without that person's consent. Force can be physical, or through the use of threats, bullying, manipulation, alcohol/drugs or harassment. Any unwanted sexual activity - including kissing, touching, groping, flashing, oral sex, intercourse, photographing, etc. - under any circumstances is sexual assault.
- More than half of all sexual assaults happen in the survivor's own home, or within 1.6 km of it. Another 20% happen in the home of a friend, neighbour or relative.
What is rape?
- The words we use to talk about sexual assault have changed over the years. Rape is a term that is no longer used in Canada, in a legal sense. It is still commonly used to describe vaginal, oral, or anal intercourse without consent. This, however, does not cover all other unwanted sexual advances that may not go as far as actual intercourse, so the more general term "sexual assault" is preferred. You may see or hear the word "victim" being used to describe someone who has been sexually assaulted. The preferred term to use is "survivor" because it gives a more empowering perspective to the person who has lived through the sexual assault and continues to live after and deal with the affect it has on their life.
Are there different types of sexual assault?
- When we imagine sexual assault we often think of a creepy stalker hiding in the bushes or in a dark alley who pounces and attacks you. The reality is that this case, although it can happen, is not the most common type of sexual assault. Most sexual assaults happen between people who know each other. We can divide assault into 4 different categories:
- Relationship Violence - Dating violence is the emotional, physical, and/or sexual abuse of one partner by another in a dating relationship. It can even occur between married couples. If sexual advances are unwanted, it doesn't matter if you are married or dating - no means no.
- Sexual Harassment - These are any unwanted sexual advances and can range from seemingly harmless to severe. Examples could include: unwanted requests for sexual favours, unwanted verbal or physical conduct of a sexual nature, pinching, patting, "dirty" jokes, comments, suggestions, etc. This behaviour does not have to be intentional to be considered sexual harassment. Sexual harassment can sometimes happen in the workplace where a few colleagues enjoy jokes and sexually suggestive talk, but it makes another coworkers uncomfortable.
- Drug Facilitated Sexual Assault - Often known as "drug rape" or "date rape," this is when someone uses the fact that you've taken or been given alcohol or drugs to sexually assault you. This sexual assault can be anything from unwanted kissing or touching, to intercourse. If a person is under the influence of drugs or alcohol, they can not give consent to any sexual activity because their mind and judgement are impaired. Any sexual activity while drunk or high can be considered assault.
- Sexual Exploitation - This is the sexual abuse of a person through the exchange of sex or sexual acts for something else. Often this is money, drugs, or gifts, but it can include other things like shelter, protection and the basics of life like food. This can also include the creation or viewing of pornography and sexually explicit images or websites.
What about sexting?
- Sexting is the sending and receiving of sexually suggestive text and images over the internet. Usually this is done by phone through text messages, but it can include messages on social media or though email. Often there is no actual sexual contact that takes place between the people involved - it's just the suggestion of it through words and pictures. Just because there is no physical touching doesn't mean that it is not sexual assault or harassment.
- Sending sexually suggestive materials between two consenting adults is not illegal if it is wanted by both people. However, if the words or images are sent outside the two people involved, then it becomes a type of sexual harassment. A boyfriend and girlfriend may send these types of images to each other within their relationship and they have given consent for each other to see them. But if one of them sends the pictures or words to someone else that is harassment because the sender did not give consent for anyone else to see those pictures. A person who holds a sexual image of someone else could use it as "blackmail" to force them to do something for them (like, if you don't do this for me I'll send this pic out to the whole school). This is cyberbullying and is considered harassment.
- If the words or images are exchanged between people where one of them is below the age of consent (< 16 years old), then it becomes a serious crime because that person is still legally classified as a "child." Any images of that person can even be considered child pornography, which is a serious crime that carries minimum sentences of 2 years or more in prison.
- The thing about the internet is that once an image or words has been sent, there is very little that can be done to take those words or images back. There is nothing preventing the person who receives that message from forwarding it on to hundreds of other people or saving it to use against you later. This is especially common between dating couples who keep the images and use them to punish their ex-girlfriend or boyfriend after they breakup. Even if you think you have deleted an image, there are ways that it can be retrieved electronically from cell phones and computer hard drives. Even years later, sexually suggestive images have resurfaced of celebrities or political figures that have been published by newspapers and ruined peoples' careers.
What is consent?
- Consent is permission for something to happen, or an agreement to do something. Sexual consent is permission to participate in a sexual act, whether it is viewing, touching, or intercourse. If sexual consent is not given, any sex acts or suggestions that take place are considered sexual assault and can be punished by law.
- Sexual consent must be a clear and obvious "yes." It should not be a guessing game. If you don't know if someone is consenting, just ask! It should be very plain to you if the other person consents. If you are unsure, stop what you are doing. It is better for both people to be safe and wait until consent is totally obvious. You can think of it as the "default setting" is NO, unless you are sure that the person says yes. It's as simple as respecting and communicating with your partner. Read their body language and ask, "Are you sure?" or "Are you ready?" or "Do you want to?" Then it is clear to everyone that it's okay or not okay to proceed.
- Sometimes a person may say yes at the beginning of a sexual encounter, but may change their mind partway through. Perhaps the person was fine with kissing and touching, but does not want to go any further than that. They are allowed to say no, even once sex has been initiated. A "no" at any point means that you should stop what you are doing immediately. If you try to go on and pressure the other person, you are going against their consent and that may be considered assault. This includes if the person has given consent to sexual contact in the past. If they say "no" today, you should not proceed any further. No one is obligated to participate in sexual activities just because they've done it before. Each time is a new encounter that they can consent or not consent to.
- If you are drunk, high, or otherwise intoxicated, you CANNOT physically give your consent. Drugs and alcohol impair your judgement and you may suddenly want to do things that you would never do sober. If you know that one or both partners are intoxicated in any way, no sexual acts should occur because consent can't be legally given. Even if the drunk person seems enthusiastically into the sexual act at the time, this can still be considered sexual assault.
Where can I go for help?
- No matter what, sexual assault is NEVER a victim's fault. And it's not a person's responsibility to "prevent" themselves from being assaulted. You weren't "asking for it", no matter what your behaviour was, how you were dressed, or where you were. The only person responsible for a sexual assault is the person who commits it.
- Tell someone about it immediately. Even if the person threatens you or people you care about if you tell. It is important to get help as soon as possible. Remember that it is not your fault that something bad happened to you, so you should not have to fear punishment if you tell someone what happened. You did not do anything wrong.
- If a friend or someone you know has been sexually assaulted it is your responsibility to help them tell, or to tell someone on their behalf. Do not promise to keep a sexual assault a secret for a friend. You should try to encourage them to be strong and support them, but if they won't tell an adult or other trusted person, you need to let someone know. Keeping the secret will only hurt your friend in the long run, and hopefully your friend will understand that.
What can I do to protect myself?
- Although sexual assault is never the fault of the victim, there are some things that you can do to help yourself from getting into situations where you might be at risk of assault. Here are some suggestions:
- Use a buddy system - Keep an eye on yourself and your friends when you are out. If you are worried or feel uncomfortable, tell your friends and ask them to watch out for you. If you leave a house or event, tell your friends where you are going and whether or not you plan on returning at a certain time. Then they will know where and when to look for you don't return.
- Watch for signs - Alcohol is the number one drug associated with sexual assaults. At a party sometimes the host or someone else may bring you a drink that they have mixed. It could be possible that they are adding extra alcohol to your drink so you will get drunk faster than you are expecting. Even non-alcoholic drinks can also be spiked with drugs that have no flavour or smell, but that make you impaired or make you lose consciousness. These drugs can take effect very quickly, so it's important to tell someone right away if your drink looks, tastes or smells weird, or you feel really giddy or sleepy.
- Keep a phone - Cell phones are an excellent device for personal safety if you use them properly. If you think that you are in danger, call 9-1-1 right away. Most cell phones have an emergency feature that allows you to easily call 911, even if you are trapped or can't move easily. If you call 911 and aren't able to talk on the phone because you're in a dangerous situation, emergency responders can track the location of most cell phones and will try to come to help you. You can even use your cell phone to take photographs of people around you, things you see, or even make an audio recording that can be used as possible evidence if you are assaulted.
- Know your rights - Everybody has the right to have control over what happens to his or her body. People can choose with whom, when, and for how long any activity takes place. Even if a couple is actively engaged in sex, either person has the right to change his or her mind and stop the activity at any time. You are never obligated to participate in any sexual acts with anyone. Even if that person has bought you a gift, or given you a ride home, or taken you out on a date, or invited you to a special party. You never have to do anything you don't want to.
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